Friday, May 8, 2009

Felonious Capers



Remember Kids: Like everything the Admiral lays his eyes upon, this shit is not exactly safe for work. It's still tasteful in a way; albeit, perverse and contumacious. Sexxxxxy Time, nonetheless.

I am totally back at it again *can't stop, won't stop*. I can't think of anything finer than scouring the internet in an illustrious attempt to thief my way to satisfaction. I done gripped me a classic.
*Erupts into double-time moon walk, complete with groin thrusting/grabbing, gold spray painted hockey knee pads, and rhinestone glove - Ta Heeeee Heeeeeeeee...
Chhh' monnnnn*




Big up to JSBM who continue to destroy my ability to focus. What results is a stern warning to the general public: These two hooligans should be considered armed and dangerous.

This one I obtained by the classiest of means. Searching 'Hottest Girl Ever' on YouTube.

Enjoy: (The title is not misleading - I guess it's old, but new to me...)

Sidenote: While she is damn fine, she could have done a lot more in the ass shaking department (and the audio department). That being said, beggars can't be choosers I believe is the saying. As per usual, I'd still spunkload a brat into her.



IMPORTANT AUDIO UPDATE: The magicbox known simply as iPhone has assisted me yet again. If you haven't heard, they have an app that hooks you up with the name and album for any song, any genre, EVER!!* Shazam is the name of the app, and I now know that the song in this video is Criminal, by Fiona Apple. Well, there you go. Technology gives me a boner more often than not these days.

* Does not actually have every song... I would still take great pleasure having sex with it; not so much with Fiona Apple. Again, knowing me, a brat causing spunkload within could be a possiblity for Miss Apple. I'll be Mr. Banana.



I am well aware there is an inner pervert in all of us. I am known to keep it real more often than not. My actions today fall under the 'More Often' umbrella. Click on the damn post to see more.

To recapitulate the theorem delineated herein:

((Titties + Ass) + Not Being At Work) x (Blood Alcohol Level/π) = Good Fucking Time + √Twat.


Simple algebra, cohorts and compatriots.

One love, one nation.




I see you've made it this far. Pervert. I am a man of my word, thus and so, without further delay:

How to start? Well, we can't forget to stretch.



More Spunkery:

God Bless Her:



Rusty Says: Why is this video so fucking hot? If I was in Hollywood, I would pitch a project where this premise replaces Fear Factor.

Onwards, and UPwards!

***** PLEASE TURN THE AUDIO OFF BEFORE WATCHING THIS NEXT ONE. IF THIS IS DONE, YOU WILL ENJOY. IF NOT, YOU MAY STILL ENJOY - THE TALKING MAKES ME WANT TO GO JUMPSTART THURSDAY NIGHT SHANKAPALOOZA. ****

Wow:



Shakems:



Interesting...




I could go on for days, but there's more important things afoot.

This Post Would Not Have Been Possible Without The Loving Support Of:


- Rusty Shackleford
- Enzyte
- The Letter 'P'
- JSBM's attention to the bonerific arts.
- Trainwreck Kush
- www.thesaurus.com
- Kokanee "Glacier Pack" 18 deep.
- Große Brüste und Dichter Arsch



1 comment:

  1. If I may interject for a moment. I do believe that this post may very well be the single most intellectual smut post in the history of this site. I'm not sure whether I should be stimulated, or sip expensive scotch and read a thesaurus. I am now confused.

    ReplyDelete